February + the idea of love = $_$Marketing. For me it is the entire focal point for the month of February. It is the marketing ploy of every business to try and sell the idea of love. You don't need to sell it, love is something that must be showed every day. Or maybe I'm just bitter. Maybe I'm just too clouded to appreciate the month of love. Truth is, February can do a lot of things especially on February 14. Couples go out on dates, strengthen the relationship that they have and for some, rekindle their lost magic. As much as I am a bit scrooge on this month, I have to say, it is indeed the month of love. What a hypocrite.
Today, February 29 shows that we actually are in a leap year. It'll be another four years 'till the next one. And while I don't really care about the leap year that much, today still marks the last day for the month of love. As usual, I end it like any other previous February, loveless. I try not to show to the world that I am bitter on this month. Circumstances dictates that I go solo for this month. No flowers to give. No chocolates to buy. No dates to plan. I just do stuff on my own. But once in a while I get to think how my life would be if I was like any other person who goes along the marketing ploy for this month. Giving someone a bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates and having a romantic dinner. I've imagined those for so many times, quite frankly have tried those but just never to the point where I get to do that on a month of February.
I can remember my first February in which I was in love with someone. It was 4th Year high, February 14, 2006. Everyone was busy getting the love aura spread across the school. Guys were preparing their gifts while girls were giggly on what they might receive. I came in to school not knowing if I'll give the girl I like a flower or not. Note I was a fat kid then and she is a beautiful girl in a high school setting plus I had small confidence, you do the math. Basically I chickened out. My two friends were telling me I should have given her something and if I don't do something before my day ends, I'll forever regret it. I ended the day and up to this point I don't regret it perse, but I can only imagine if I only did. What could have happen to me on that day? What would I be today?
College came and pretty much Valentine's sure went up to another level. At that point in my life, on two separate February 14s I did the unthinkable. February 14, 2008, I gave the girl I like at that time a letter and a rose. February 14, 2010, I did the same to a different girl. Both were two different paths, but the same outcome, I didn't end up with any of them. There out probably with their rich boyfriends right now. Looking back on those instances, I might have not handled it correctly. Despite I was going for the hottest girl in the class, I just didn't handle it correctly. Or maybe I was too ambitious. Either way, I simply lack the skills and the correct moves to make the girl fall for me.
So maybe there were times where I wasn't completely loveless on a month of February, but if you check the long-term effect, I still pretty much ended up loveless. I guess I never learned to appreciate the month of love is because I've been a failure on my previous crusades to be in a relationship with a girl. I was once a very romantic-minded person but those heart-ripping rejections might have provided a sour taste in my tongue. Despite the truth that businesses do take advantage on this month, it is still the month of love. I'm just one of those cases that never really got a break on heartbreaks. But remembering those previous February s, you know what, I was in-love during those times. I wouldn't end up writing those poems or having the courage to give those flowers if it wasn't for the month of love. The fact that I chose February 14 as the day I will show my love to those girls meant that for me, February was the month of love. Even if I would still rant about how this month of February is just another month for marketing love next year, I still believe that this month will mean more than that. This month had a meaning for me before, I know it will have another meaning again. And that is to celebrate unconditional genuine love.
Damn right.
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